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| Subject: | I appreciate that, hun. It's even harder when she's pretty much the |
| From: | Wahoo |
| Date: | Sun, 22-Jun-2025 11:37:36 AM PDT |
| Where: | SoapZone Community Message Board |
| In topic: | ~~*Week of June 16th Potpourri*~~ posted by Leia |
| In reply to: | I’m sorry that your BFF doesn’t want to go to Marietta with you and even sorrier posted by Kitchop |
I've considered that. I mentioned here before that she went into nursing for the money and the steady income, not because she had a burning desire to help people. That sounds harsh--she's not totally without empathy--but even she will admit to it. At first, she was proud to be a nurse...a little TOO proud, TBH, always working her occupation into any conversation with a stranger within the first few sentences. But I know she feels nursing is no longer considered a career to be admired, despite the bump of approval it gained during the pandemic when people were "clapping medical personnel off to work" and sending pizzas to hospitals. So IMO--and this is JUST my opinion--I think she's fine with losing her identity as a nurse but not as someone receiving a higher salary.
Ah, now this is a major mystery to me. On the one hand, I'm not a homeowner and Dad pays most of the bills associated with being one, such as utilities and property taxes. So I'm certain her expenses are MUCH more than mine. But OTOH, her house is paid off. Her car is paid off. She's never had kids or any other dependents. She's never had expensive hobbies. She travelled but no more than once a year and only once to a destination outside of the US/Canada (a trip to Italy with a cousin, where they split costs and occasionally stayed for free with family). Which leads me to wonder...where did the money go? She was out of work slightly longer than I was, though she briefly worked for her nephew (and didn't get paid as much as she was owed, unfortunately), so there's that to consider. But I've wondered--and there's really no polite way to ask--if she's *truly* broke or if a chunk of her salary from her nursing days went to some kind of fund she can't/won't touch until retirement. I remember a (very) vague discussion years ago about her having a 403B plan through the hospital where she worked and her saying it was so much better than a 401K plan, which it very well may be since I know nothing about 403Bs <g>. She might've put a huge chunk of salary in that and would be unable to (or just highly encouraged not to?) touch it until she reaches a certain age.
Thank you, and she is.
I would like to ask her just that. I can see her saying no to a therapist--she'd claim that's money she doesn't have to spend. But there are free resources available if she really wanted to talk to someone...or she could just talk to me. As long as we've been besties, we've never really been the "open our hearts and pour it out to one another" type of friends, though I feel the option is there for either of us, if that makes sense. I was telling good church friend today after church that I'm hoping to get bff (who gcf is also friends with now) out to just DO things other than work, cocoon at home and fret about her situation. If she'd be open to that...there's certainly nothing wrong with cocooning but that's never really been who she is. But maybe it's who she is now? If so, I wish she'd just TELL me so I could stop thinking about possible future trips we could take :-(
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A lot of her money may very well be tied up in a retirement fund and - Kitchop - 22-Jun-2025 12:44 PM
- I've wondered if bff thinks once she's retired, she'll do all the things - Wahoo - 22-Jun-2025 12:59 PM